Sex and Ownership

November 20, 2009

Oh yeah, I’m angry this week. I’ve been having some dating drama, and one of the first questions people ask me before they give advice is “are you having sex with him?” And what if I am?

When did sex start meaning ownership? So I’m sleeping with a guy, that means he’s now my boyfriend? That means he can say who I see? I don’t think so. Sex can sometimes just be sex. What if I’ve slept with him a few times, but meet someone else I find more exciting at the time. If I don’t have sex with the first guy anymore can I sleep with the second. Or wait, does that make me a whore in this double standard world we live in.

Why is it, if I’m sleeping with a guy, I am suddenly off the market, but he’s fair game. It used to be that marriage was a sale transaction. You were handed over to your husband along with a dowry. Essentially you were bought and sold in one big ceremony. Now, I open my legs and that means I’m the property of some guy.

Maybe I want something more. I’m careful, I use protection, I get to know the guys I sleep with, so if none of them want to commit then why should I deny myself what I am certain they are not? Stand up with me, let’s say no to the status quo. Let’s overturn this last double standard. Let’s start calling men who sleep around whores, and allow ourselves some more freedom.

Or, go the opposite route. Go back in time and stop sleeping with men unless they commit. Either way, they’ll get the message.